Friday, April 08, 2005

Why didn’t I think of that?

If I was a really switched on business-type geezer I might have seen the marketing possibilities just a bit sooner.

I might have set up a stall selling stuff.

I would have made a fortune.

And all in a matter of little more than 4 hours.

I wonder who got it though?

The franchise.

The licence to print money.

And sanctioned by the big guy in the sky no less.

He’s one lucky – and very rich entrepreneur.

What am I talking about?

A one day franchise for a black tie sales booth in St Peter’s Square, Rome – of course!

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

On the warpath yet again…….

Letter to The BIG Lottery Fund concerning their pathetic cave in. Allowing HMG to raid the BLF piggy bank of another 45 million quid to fund their Schools food quango. A pathetic fop to the shame that pukka Jamie Oliver heaped on the Ministry of Education…..

Is it true that us lottery punters are now expected to bankroll yet ANOTHER Big Government initiative?

It appears to be another BIG quango bonanza as more BIG money cash is pumped into areas that should by rights be funded direct from our taxes.

The BIG money figure quoted is £45 million.
This is utterly appalling.
This is NOT why I, and millions of other jaundiced punters play the lottery every week.

When John Major initiated the Lottery, he put safeguards in place to stop Government filching the cash. These appear to have been taken down and discarded - BIG brick by BIG brick.
The Government seem to view the BIG Lottery Fund as a sort of BIG piggy bank - to dip in at will, with no one from the Big Lottery Management Team (or 'flock' for short) saying anything about it.

There seems to be absolutely no time at all between a Government request for BIG cash and the granting of even bigger cash. Can you people only say 'NO' to the little groups and organisations - the very people that the BLF was set up to service.

I am absolutely disgusted. Your granting of this and other BIG money to our mendacious Government is little short of criminal.


You should rename yourself - I suggest the BIG POODLE GOVERNMENT FUND.
Sirs, you are an utter joke.

Yours, etc, etc.

Tomorrow, the Big Lottery Flock hit back with half a ton of Alfie hating invective….. (And I’m still trying to work out what the hell they’re talking about)

Monday, April 04, 2005

Pontifications on a Sunday afternoon

My number 3 son, still reeling at the untimely croakedness of JP2, asked me what exactly the Pope did…

"What exactly does the Pope do for his money then Dad?"

"Oh, you know, he sort of wears a dress, does a lot of blessings and can’t have any sex at all"

"How much does a Pope get paid then?"

"You know, I don’t think they actually get paid anything – but they do have free unfettered use of the Popemobile"…

"So, the Pope, doesn’t actually get paid, drives a car that looks like a greenhouse, wears a dress and never has sex – ever?"..

"Apparently so"

"You know, being a Pope sounds like a pretty crap job all round, really"