Thursday, June 23, 2005

Andrew Murray - tennis wonderkind...

Listening to the radio, I have noticed how many times a drooling FiveLive commentary team are most careful to emphasise that Andrew Murray is from SCOTLAND - and not Britain..... "Murray from Scotland"... "Plucky Scot, Murray"..... etc, etc....

It's funny, but I can't remember Tim Henman - when he was regularly getting to the quarters and semis of Wimbledon - EVER being called 'The Englishman, Tim Henman' or 'England's Tim Henman' or 'England's great tennis hope, Tim Henman'...

He has always been known as 'Britain's Tim Henman'...... Hasn't he?

I'm all for national pride - so why, when an Englishman is successful, he is 'British' - and when a Scot is successful, he is 'Scottish'? And if the media start to call him/her 'British' - they are accused of 'hijacking' their own Scottish heroes...

You can see this happening all over sport today - for example, in F1motor racing. David Coulthard has a Scottish Saltire plastered all over his helmet - Jensen Button has a Union flag on his. When he changed it to a St George's cross last summer to support the England football team, he was assailed by an ITV commentator, demanding to know why he was being so 'un-British' and unpatriotic by removing the Union Flag - and replacing it with a "Red and White squiggle"..... The design was artistic, in the same way that the Union flag was, but Button still felt the need to explain and to justify it... Needless to say, he made Button feel embarrassed and uncomfortable - and sure enough, at the next race Jensen had replaced the St George's cross with the British emblem....
David's identity is strongly Scottish and that is perfectly fine.. when he is mentioned, he is 'The Scot, David Coulthard'... Button, however is always referred to as 'The British driver, Jensen Button'....

It is clear that as far as the establishment are concerned, Scottish sportsmen/women are Scottish, Welsh sportsmen/women are Welsh and Northern Irish sportsmen/women are Northern Irish.......
But what of English sportsmen/women? Well, of course, they're all from BRITAIN, obviously!!!!

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Free the ‘Plate-gate 1’ ....
  • from this

  • Neil Prendergast a young driver from Manchester was caught bang to rights by the Old Bill last Friday. A plain clothes plod in a plain clothes plod-car pulled him over and slapped a 30 quid ticket into his surly, suspiciously guilty, suspiciously ordinary Astra saloon owner’s hand.

    "Well, as soon as I saw him, I just knew he was a bad ‘un’. The streets are safer now this scum has been banged up" reported P.C. Agenda.

    Well thank goodness for that. I can tell my old Mum she can go and get her pension in complete safety now that the law has come down on Prendergast with all the force of Charles Clarke sitting on a kitten. .

    So what crime did young Prendergast commit that was just so heinous? The very worse crime of all, apparently….. a shocking and wanton declaration of identity. Yes, Prendergast (aka Baby-Face Caponee-ownee) was caught with a St George’s cross and the word ‘ENG’ provocatively and brazenly displayed on his registration plate. Sorry, it’s twice as bad as that…. He had the flag on both registration plates. And not only that, he’s obscured the Euro flag in the process – twice!……

    I feel sick. There should be a list that this sicko has to register on, so the police and good citizens can keep tabs – and if necessary, send the vigilantes round to work a bit of retribution. I’d call it the 'flagophile file'…..

    Alfie the man whose arm is strong - and vengeance total, has been doing a bit of detective work to get to the bottom of this ‘happy slappy, flag not flappy’ craze and has managed to find a sad and perverted enthusiast of the ‘flag on the plate’ genre.

    He told me his name was ‘Reginald Plate’ – or Reg for short.
    I’m not sure I believe him.
    He said he originally put the stickers on to support England in last years Euro Nations Cup….. and it sort of grew from there. He’s now expanded his flag collection, nothing is off limits anymore….. car air fresheners, stickers for the back window, even the ‘Reg and Sharon’ sticker along the top of the front windscreen has been binned in favour of one saying ‘ENGERLAND 4 EVER’…….

    He said that sometimes a whole load of these ‘enthusiasts’ gather at a ‘flag meet’ to wave the flag and taunt the filth. "Sometimes, it can get quite nasty when a few of us get together to try and compose a national anthem. Afterwards, we feel great... but, you know.... a bit, well 'dirty'"…

    ‘Sick’, just isn’t the word…. – ‘revolution’ is.

    Reg Plate in front of his banned plate doing a bit of fuzz taunting.......