Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Free the ‘Plate-gate 1’ ....
  • from this

  • Neil Prendergast a young driver from Manchester was caught bang to rights by the Old Bill last Friday. A plain clothes plod in a plain clothes plod-car pulled him over and slapped a 30 quid ticket into his surly, suspiciously guilty, suspiciously ordinary Astra saloon owner’s hand.

    "Well, as soon as I saw him, I just knew he was a bad ‘un’. The streets are safer now this scum has been banged up" reported P.C. Agenda.

    Well thank goodness for that. I can tell my old Mum she can go and get her pension in complete safety now that the law has come down on Prendergast with all the force of Charles Clarke sitting on a kitten. .

    So what crime did young Prendergast commit that was just so heinous? The very worse crime of all, apparently….. a shocking and wanton declaration of identity. Yes, Prendergast (aka Baby-Face Caponee-ownee) was caught with a St George’s cross and the word ‘ENG’ provocatively and brazenly displayed on his registration plate. Sorry, it’s twice as bad as that…. He had the flag on both registration plates. And not only that, he’s obscured the Euro flag in the process – twice!……

    I feel sick. There should be a list that this sicko has to register on, so the police and good citizens can keep tabs – and if necessary, send the vigilantes round to work a bit of retribution. I’d call it the 'flagophile file'…..

    Alfie the man whose arm is strong - and vengeance total, has been doing a bit of detective work to get to the bottom of this ‘happy slappy, flag not flappy’ craze and has managed to find a sad and perverted enthusiast of the ‘flag on the plate’ genre.

    He told me his name was ‘Reginald Plate’ – or Reg for short.
    I’m not sure I believe him.
    He said he originally put the stickers on to support England in last years Euro Nations Cup….. and it sort of grew from there. He’s now expanded his flag collection, nothing is off limits anymore….. car air fresheners, stickers for the back window, even the ‘Reg and Sharon’ sticker along the top of the front windscreen has been binned in favour of one saying ‘ENGERLAND 4 EVER’…….

    He said that sometimes a whole load of these ‘enthusiasts’ gather at a ‘flag meet’ to wave the flag and taunt the filth. "Sometimes, it can get quite nasty when a few of us get together to try and compose a national anthem. Afterwards, we feel great... but, you know.... a bit, well 'dirty'"…

    ‘Sick’, just isn’t the word…. – ‘revolution’ is.

    Reg Plate in front of his banned plate doing a bit of fuzz taunting.......

    12 comments:

    Mosher said...

    The wording from the DVLA site (http://www.dvla.gov.uk/vehicles/regmarks/reg_marks_current_requirements.htm#europlate) is:

    "The Government announced on 28 December 2001 the intention to permit the display of national flags and national identifiers on vehicle number plates. The Road Vehicles (Display of Registration Marks) Regulations 2001 are in the process of being amended. They will provide for the voluntary display of the Union flag, Scottish Saltire, Cross of St George and Red Dragon. Football team crests etc are not allowed."

    So technically, the police quote on the news story is right while the RAC one is wrong. The last announcement was that they intended to allow people to get rid of that bloody euro thing and put a proper flag on. However, as they've not gotten around to it yet, it means officious little pricks looking to bump up their points quota for the week can fine people for being proud of their country.

    What a farce.

    Kenny said...

    Until we talked about this at lunch I really hadn't given the old E word much thought. But having been away for so long, and having had some time to observe, I am starting to vehemently agree with you on the subject. That said, I still focus my pathos on the other E word - Europe. Ack.

    wonkotsane said...

    Nice one Alfie, made me chuckle to myself. Nobody at work asked me why I was chuckling, I think they probably guessed and didn't want another sermon. :D

    Unfortunately, from a legal point of view the police are within their rights to prosecute as it is still against the law. The government have asked the police not to but that's not binding. Sadly, you will always get sad little hitlers like this one who obviously have a problem catching real criminals and busy themselves handing out fixed penalties for irrelevant and unimportant offences like this.

    Alan Saunders said...

    The flag's OK. I'd have fined him for being, or being in contact with, a Mail on Sunday reader :-)

    mexican flag said...

    I have a flag that was flown during WWII. It started my collection and my new business. I am always looking for more info on flags and found your post.
    Thanks,
    mexican flag

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